Wednesday, December 16, 2015

my word for 2016 (that I'm removing from all conversations)

A few weeks ago it became apparent that the word "busy" was slipping into every conversation I was having. I started shocking myself with the ease with which I was saying it - even writing it. And just when I thought I'd exhausted the word, Poet declared that she had a very "busy" day ahead of her. My language had become hers and I didn't like what I was hearing.

It's easy to dismiss the power of words and the effect they have on my mindset, my home life and my family. One of my biggest personal issues is one that directly effects my day-to-day. The juggle of work and motherhood is nothing new to me and yet I go through phases when it all seems a little overwhelming. But when I jot down the to-dos on paper, they're always, always, manageable.

And yet I continue to think and say that I'm busy. And declaring my busyness perpetuates a busy, frantic, overwhelmed mindset. It doesn't take long for me to become so bogged down by my apparent busyness that I loose sight of the reality of the situation - the reality of my day. Subsequently, I don't see what's right in front of me. I don't see the abundant fruit bowl, the healthy children, the supportive partner, the beautiful clothes, the expansive ocean. I just see work that needs to get done and no sign of it easing any time soon.

Isn't the mind powerful, that it can fabricate such a false sense of reality. 

This past week I've gone to utter the word "busy" countless times and yet I've stopped myself and subsequently, settled the mind. 

In our home we don't let anyone utter the words "stupid" or "idiot" or "dumb" and from now on, I'm not going to let the word "busy" out of my mouth. It's a small step towards simplifying my day-to-day and maintaining a happier and calmer mindset.

Are you embracing or removing a word for the New Year?


17 COMMENTS

  1. So wise as always Jodi, I need to remember this too. xx

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  2. Wow I it's like you've read my mind. I too recently decided to no longer use the word 'busy' as it was creeping into my conversations more and more although I had made a conscious decision to slow down my life to spend more time with my family. It's funny how I now really pick up when other people use the term in their conversation and I almost cringe a little bit inside.

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  3. It's easy to do isn't it until you are more conscious of not doing it. We are the same in our household no one is allowed to say stupid or idiot either.

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  4. This is exactly what I've been thinking/feeling Jodi. too often when someone asks how we are, we say 'busy' and our world around us glorifies the state of busyness. I'm going to be mindful of saying the word too and hopefully that will rub off on the kids! x

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  5. Yes! Busy is a fascinating and scary word. It can really take over and bring such a needless negatvity to otherwise simple and lovely tasks. I clearly remember a speaker from a retreat I went to a few years ago talking about not using the word busy and I think it really changed my language. It also made me realise that as a society we tend to glorify busyness as a good thing, which is often not the case at all.
    Thanks for the reminder.
    Wishing you a slow, relaxing and beautiful Christmas lovely x

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  6. It's a word I try not to use, in fact I try not to be busy.
    I think the word I need to remove from my vocab is should. It always invokes guilt or inadequacy.
    Cheers kate

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  7. So very true, & what a gift of insightful ness our young children are. here's to holidays & just being in the momentđź’•

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  8. I fully agree that I need to lose the word 'busy'. I first noticed it when my neighbour would ask how I am, and I would reply "ok, well you know, really busy", and he obviously hate that word and immediately look bored. I felt bad when he'd say "yeah well everyone's busy..."
    It is a silly thing to say because everyone's busy and there's got to be more to my life than the fact that I am hella busy.... Next time I'm going to reply with "I'm awesome!! Life is good and keeping me on my toes!" Haha.
    Http://saintsonaplane.com

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  9. i love this, and your right... it's like a mask that makes things feel more chaotic than they actually are. my goal is actually quite similar. it is to stop complaining. which mostly involves use of the word "busy."

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  10. Thank you for the reminder. We almost have a cult of busyness in our culture and seem to be trying to outdo each other in the busyness competition. I try very hard not to be busy, yet even I feel compelled to use that word when someone asks how I am.

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  11. Oh yes! I cringe when I ask family and friends how they are and they respond with "good, busy." Busy is a choice and you put it perfectly Jodi, when you say "the mind fabricates a false sense of reality." I'd go further and say we create a false self; we aren't true persons when we're caught up in our little worlds of "busyness." How wonderful are our children though! Humbling little reminders that redirect us to what's important. X

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  12. How nice to read! I wrote a little post not long ago on how I had decided to stop complaining about time. I have been practicing for a few month now, not allowing myself to say "I don't have time" and I have to say that I makes quite a big difference in my approach to time, hours, days, priorities and it also made me realize how much people use these words and the stressed-look that usually comes with it. Now if I run into a friend at the grocery store and I am in a rush, instead of saying "I don't have time to talk" I'll say "let's make time soon to catch up!". Anyways. I think "busy" is a good word to let go of! Thanks for sharing, as always.
    (here's what I wrote : http://www.happy-bandits.com/home/on-making-time)
    xx

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  13. How insightful you are. All of what we do is by choice. There is no room for argument here b/c if you think about it, it's true. Yes we need money but where and how we choose to live, how many children we have chosen to feed and clothe and educate, and so on are all via free will. So to feel busy is too, a choice. Or we can take Jodi's sage advice and simply make our lists, quietly do the work, and savor the in between that is what will be remembered in the end.

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  14. I talk about choosing your busy. My days are busy, there's no doubt, but the things that make me busy are my choice. My life. They are the things that enrich and make my life interesting. What I try to do is make sure I don't whinge about being busy. I actually think at this time of year I am less busy than normal and I am enjoying that.

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  15. I talk about choosing your busy. My days are busy, there's no doubt, but the things that make me busy are my choice. My life. They are the things that enrich and make my life interesting. What I try to do is make sure I don't whinge about being busy. I actually think at this time of year I am less busy than normal and I am enjoying that.

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  16. I've had a similar occurrence at our house. Me ss 3 has been saying . I'm too busy to do that.... I cringe. I read a post last year where she replaced busy with full as she didn't like the negative connotation busy implies... I think I'm going to try the same see ya later busy!

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  17. I read somewhere that saying you're "busy" all the time to people is really boasting about yourself but disguising it as a complaint. Listening to a friend say how busy she is all the time and feeling she was claiming her self importance has made me rethink saying "I'm busy" to others, no matter how true it may be. It is drab.

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