Friday, March 27, 2015

the fourth trimester

the last of the blooms from congratulatory bouquets 

You would think that typing one-handed whilst breastfeeding is a little like riding a bike; once learned, the skill is yours for life. I'm here to tell you that that's not entirely true. 

As our restful babymoon reaches its inevitable end, I'm still conscious of the fact that for the next few months we will take it one day at a time through the fourth trimester. Sure, it may be the language of the more alternative birthing folk but as far as I'm concerned, the fourth trimester is very real - for both mother and baby. I'm honouring the fact that my body is still soft and tender from relaxin; the weariness of life with a newborn requires a certain amount of patience and self-care. Percy sleeps next to me at night, spends hours in my arms everyday and when left unswaddled, is still curled tightly like in utero. He's still so fresh and new, not yet ready to travel far from my arms. 

Whilst I may be able to string a sentence together and I did get the dishes done after dinner last night (small yet worthy accomplishments) I am still very much floating about in the post-birth haze. But floating and life with three children isn't always a good match and I'm well aware of the fact that a new normal is just around the corner. I'm tentatively stepping into it knowing that it's a slightly different reality to the one I envisioned and prepared for during pregnancy. You see, the week I went into early labour coincided with Daniel starting a new job (we could only laugh at the timing). This new job brings with it such fabulous opportunities for Daniel and our family but I'm also aware of how long the days will be without him here. Thankfully, it's only three days a week but like any new routine, it will take us all a while to adjust.

My fears about life with three children have, thankfully, subsided. I'm here now, in the thick of the juggle, with a newborn resting on my shoulder, a snotty three-year-old doing pirouettes in front of me and a seven-year-old asking me questions about how I produce milk. I can't see the couch for the pile of washing that is waiting to be folded and I have no idea how it got to be Friday afternoon so quickly.

Yes it's busy but it's also everything I have ever wanted. 


18 COMMENTS

  1. Beautiful Jodie.
    Keep your eyes on the blessings and joy all around you. Such a precious time. xx

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  2. Love this. I'm due this Sunday with my third :)

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    1. Congratulations! Wishing you a calm delivery. Enjoy all the newborn scents, sounds and snuggles xx

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  3. Jodi, you make me fear less about perhaps being a mother one day - congratulations again, and high fives for getting the dishes done ;)

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  4. Your last sentence is just perfect and made me smile x

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  5. Ha ha…I am reading this while staring at laundry that has taken me four days to get to the folded stage…now I just have to put it away!
    The good thing about normal is that you can't really avoid it…it just kind of seeps in and carries you along. Enjoy.

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  6. Sounds perfect Jodi in the most honest way x

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  7. This is lovely. Your family is beautiful and you sound like you're handling it all like a professional!

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  8. Just as it should be...
    Ronnie xo

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  9. Congratulations Jodi!
    You sound so together and calm. One foot in front of the other and you end up there, at your new normal.

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  10. kind of intense but poignantly wonderful? that's how I remember that time. and I remember that I wanted to hold onto every moment forever while looking forward to all the tiny changes and growth (and the whispering hope of sleep), of each new day. your three-year-old sounds just like mine right now. x

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  11. Oh Jodi, here I am feeling those familiar feelings yet I have one baby. With every moment together I feel more relaxed about incomplete chores and more in love with this sweet babe.

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  12. The 'bubble' is bliss. Thanks for sharing.

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  13. Blessings to you and your beautiful family xx

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  14. Just listened to your talk on The Birth, Babies & Bumps holistic health conference! It was so eloquent and beautifully summed up with such valuable advice, the importance of the Babymoon period and how not having visitors and standing up for that choice as parents is so Important! Just love how you explained it in such a practical way also, as a midwife I love doing home visits but see all too often how women feel the pressure to be up and out of their PJ's with a perfectly clean house and food to entertain guests! It comes down to people putting their needs to see the new baby over the needs of the new mother, baby and women just don't know how to say no at the risk of offending. This time is so precious and important for bonding, breastfeeding and recovery both physical and emotional and the awareness of this needs to be greater. I also enjoyed how you spoke of a 'grief' that women experience in the first year over this monumental shift and change as they adjust to motherhood as well as the differing experiences between mothers and fathers. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and photos I will Defintely be sharing these with new mums.
    Lauretta

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  15. i love this. you describe it all so wonderfully.

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