Monday, November 18, 2013
eighteen | practising simplicity
Living a less-distracted life : when things get tough, come back to the simple.
At around this time every year I go through a phase of reflection; thinking about what has happened and how I've changed. It's like I need to evaluate before I move into the season of celebrations and resolutions.
For a number of reasons, 2013 has been a tough one for me. Nothing particularly shocking or sad, just busy, busy life and its challenges. And I don't think I'm alone in my struggle. Perhaps it's mothers the world over who are confronted by lack of time, growing children and pressing situations. In retrospect, this year has been so hard because it's been overwhelming; I've taken a lot on and sometimes it's been too much. There's been moments of regret and sometimes, shame; those not-so-nice things that stem from busyness and rushing and stress.
But in the midst of it all, I've also had the opportunity to stop and realise that it's not how I want to live and it's not how I want to raise my children. So, I'm prioritising myself and choosing to simplify life. That word, simplicity, has been a constant for me this year and I embrace it because it's good for me. It's good for my mind, for my body, for my home and for my family. It's what I come back to when things are getting out of hand. So what does it mean? For me, it's:
- making boiled eggs and soldiers for dinner even if the kids have had the exact same meal for breakfast
- leaving the mess of the house and going to the beach for an hour, even if a deadline is looming
- saying 'no' more often and not feeling guilty about it
- accepting that we live in a family home that is both messy and beautiful (and will always be messy and beautiful)
- admitting that the internet is a major distraction and I need to be mindful of how it seeps my time, energy and patience
- going to bed early, regardless of how much work needs to be done
...and the list goes on.
Overall, being mindful of the present moment is perhaps the biggest factor in simplifying my life. It is the very essence of yoga; not getting caught up in what has been or what's to come, but being in the here and now, aware of how I'm breathing, what I'm thinking and the words I'm using. I don't do it all the time and yes, it's hard to maintain but I wholeheartedly believe it is good for me and subsequently, good for my family.
So: stop, take a deep breath, come to here and now and focus all of your energy and awareness on what you need to do right now. Simplifying is doing one thing with awareness instead of 10 things mindlessly.
posted by:
Jodi
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At this time of the year I also find myself reflecting on what has been and if I have been/am living the way I need to for my own self and for my family. 2013 has been a very hard year for me...struggles and sadness....but I've learned to become more aware of when I need to slow down and simplify my days and also my mind. I have really enjoyed reading your simplicity posts. In fact, I've gone back several times and read them all from the beginning. Sometimes we just need to hear the words outloud and from a different voice.
ReplyDeleteI hope your list brings many good changes to you and the rest of the year brings calmness and peace in your days.
Sarah xo
From this entry, might I recommend you read, Thich Nhat Hahn's "Peace Is Every Step". It beautifully expresses simple ways of living mindfully. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/14572.Peace_Is_Every_Step
ReplyDeleteYou've mentioned this book before...must add it to the list x
Delete:) Probably! I tend to rant about it.
Delete*rave - not rant. I need to get off the internets!
DeleteSimplifying is doing one thing with awareness instead of 10 things mindlessly..... Must remember this!
ReplyDeleteJodi, I haven't commented on here for a while but rest assured I haven't stopped reading! Gosh I love coming to your blog. There is something about you and the way that you write that makes me centered and gives me a feeling of calm that I don't get many other places. I wholeheartedly need to follow your approach of simplicity. Living in HK often doesn't make that easy but life is life, and we have choices. I've got number 2 on the way in a few months and now is exactly the time to take a step back and make sure boiled eggs are ok for dinner (I'm so with you there). How does life get so fast? Anyway, I just wanted to say hi and let you know I still love your blog. Thanks for reminding me to slow down. Bridget x
ReplyDeleteI so to.need to do this mum of two, mature student, wife etc I don't ever feel there is enough time in the day and get grouchy with the boys when stressed which isn't fair or nice. Missing life as I'm zooming by trying to do much at once. I have started this by makung a few changes to my degree. :)
ReplyDeleteI can relate to so many of these. Going to bed early is my biggest commitment at the minute. It makes such a massive difference. And accepting that the home will always be messy AND beautiful is a lovely way to put it.
ReplyDeleteOh your last sentence! A quote that needs imprinting in my mind! Thank you x
ReplyDeleteand on the seventh day God rested... we all need rest....God gives the rest.
ReplyDeleteOh Jodi, your words are so sage and encouraging. Thank you for being honest... this year has been unbelievably busy for us too - three moves, international travel, changing work, growing toddlerhood, health issues! And yet I regularly stop myself to regroup and refresh the heart and mind. Sleep and fresh air helps.
ReplyDeleteJodi I think so many of us can relate to what you write here, thank you for so honestly sharing how this year has been for you. I am so conscious of having one more year before my youngest heads to school and how I want to savour every moment because it is fleeting this childhood time we have with them, the writing will always be there, earning, saving, spending, projects, ambitions will always be there - childhood however doesn't last forever! Thank you for helping me to clarify my priorities right now too xx
ReplyDeletePerfectly said and timed. I've been thinking about resolutions and the new year ahead. The last two points on the list resonate the strongest with me and I truly believe that with an early bedtime and adequate sleep, then everything else will be a little easier, including living in the present moment.
ReplyDeleteAnother post, to enjoy and savour from you. Thank you
ReplyDeletethis is so true! and I can relate ... saying NO for me is kind of hard..and about time spent on the internet... well here I am..
ReplyDeletethank you jodi, i needed to hear this today....
ReplyDeleteI really need to work on accepting that mess is just part of family life and one day my children will have grown up and moved out and then, only then, the house will be spotless. But then I will look back and long for the mess and chaos and noise and lack of privacy while on the toilet!
ReplyDeleteHave you read the book 'simplicity parenting'? I think you would really love it (although like me, may never have the time to read it!) x
I have read it (and I do read it!). I think what I like most about it is the summary in italics after every few paragraphs - it means I can open to any page and glean some inspiration within minutes x
DeleteA well needed reminder. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI do so love reading your posts on simplicity.
ReplyDelete«Simplifying is doing one thing with awareness instead of 10 things mindlessly.» It's for reading sentences like this I keep coming back to your blog again and again. Thank you! A mumma from Berne, Switzerland
ReplyDeleteYes, yes, and yes. That's my response to this post. Love your series!
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written post. Trying to be mindful of what I am doing is so important. And it is my biggest challenge.
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that I found your blog via Retromummy. I love this post. I was shaking my head in agreement as I was reading. Learning and teaching yourself to be more mindful, live in this very moment instead of looking at tomorrow or the day after.
ReplyDeleteI am keen to read more:)